Wednesday, December 26, 2007

A Second surgery

Its Monday, four days after surgery and I feel like crap. Yesterday was a good day but today something is not right. They doctors want to do a CAT scan because my face seems to be little too swollen. Physical therapy was to come today but I don't know what is going on. They stopped giving me solid food. They should have tube feed me since day one. I feel sick.

I went for my cat scan. What a painful experience it was. They wheeled me down to the 2nd floor (I think) I felt every nausea. I hopped to the bench but when they were trying to get me to lay down and cried in pain. The pressure and swelling was too much in my neck and face that I needed support to lay flat on my back. The nurses asking me what was wrong. I need head support. It was too painful and I could not support my head. They helped me lay flat but it still hurt.

After that ordeal, I went up to my room. Mom was there as well as Carol the Physical therapy trainer. She could tell something was wrong. The wide eye and happy expression I had a day ago was gone. Instead a painful and sad girl laid before her. Obviously no PT.

Doctor Koch came to my room saying that there was some sort of infection that need to be taking care of right away. In other words they needed to go back in. GREAT! :(

They wheeled me down to the operating room. Very cool. I remember the wall being lots of pink and beige. The doctors and Anesthesiologists were there. Introducing themselves. Somewhere from the first surgery. Dr Koch would not perform the surgery. Instead Dr B or as I heard the nurse say, team 2 would perform it. They wheeled me into the operation room. Just like the hallway, pink and beige. They tried to get me on the table but I ended up landing half-ass. I was trying to say lets try again but before I could do it they lifted my legs and dragged in around on to the table. As the tired to lay me on to my back I gave another loud scream. My head and neck again. No support. I laid there almost in tears. The anesthesiologists put a mask over my face and said breath. At first I thought it was just oxygen but then I smelled some sort of chemicals. I assume this was to put me to sleep. Well it did not work. Not right way. Before I know it I felt some sort of tube being stuck into both my nostrils. I was saying no, wait, stop. It was painful. That lasted only about a minute or too. Then I was out.

I woke up with almost a fright. I felt something being ripped from my throat and an urgent urge to go the bathroom. In fact that was my first words. I have to pee.

After I left ICU I went up to my new room. Same floor that I was in, 4th, but the room was a corner room and much bigger. At least I could feel I could breath. Though it was a little hard with a feeding tube now coming out of my nose. They should have done this since day one then trying to make me eat right away. I also had a new drain on the left side of my neck. So now I had a matching pair. Face still swollen of course.

It was December 24th, Christmas Eve. Did not feel like it. My mom got me a little fake tree, smaller then a Charlie Brown tree. More a toy then at tree but it was cute. I remember around 6-7ish I heard a nose coming out from the hallway. It was Christmas music. I thought it was cute that the nurses were playing music for the holiday. But they weren't. It was carolers. A big group of carolers singing up and down the hall. Mom opened to door so we could hear better. You name it they were singing it. Which was nice. When they got to my wing they stopped right in front of my door and started singing Come all ye Faithful. One of my favorites. Mom was looking at them by the door. Good thing because before I knew it I started crying. All the weight of what has happened, especially over today hit me hard. I was even taking the suction for my mouth to take away my tears. I did not want my mom to see me like this. I knew if she did she would start crying. But I could not hold it. When the carolers left I broken down. Mom was like why are you crying? I want to go home. I am tired and don't want to be here. I want this to be over. Be Strong she said with tears coming out of her eyes. Of course as soon as I saw that I slowly stopped crying. But it did not last long. As soon as she left for the night I let it out again. My face, my leg, so tired. 5 days in the hospital, two surgery's and now three drains attached to me.

Here is a photo of my new look again with eyes blocked.

Happy Christmas.

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