Doctor, I have about 80 questions to ask you...

Yeap, you read it right. After looking on the internet of top questions to asked a Doctor before surgery as well as anything I could find on Ameloblastoma, (gosh, that is still hard to say AND type) I came up with a list of 80 questions. The questions ranged from, "What causes this disease? What are your credentials and training experience?" Don't know if the doctor and Thomas Jefferson Hospital was all to happy to answer them but I did not care.

I had my mother there for support. I think she was more nervous then I was. I love my mom to pieces. Anyway, we got to the point where what will happen to remove that tumor (UGH hate that world). Turns out that they have to remove 5-6 teeth and my right jaw. (WHAT!) Also they have to cut a piece of bone out of my hip and place that where my jaw once was. He stated that my hip surgery will hurt more then my mouth. There is no guarantee that the bone graft will hold. There will be scaring, possibly disfigurement and pain. To top it all off, I will have to get my jaw wired shut for 6 weeks. (Anything else you want to throw at me doctor?)

I already knew before I went into the appointment I was going to get a second opinion. I made one with the University of Pennsylvania for next week. I also called the Mayo Clinic in Jacksonville, Florida and the John Hopkins Medical Center in Maryland for 3rd and 4th opinions if need be. I can honestly tell you I am in such a state of denial about the whole thing. I really should not be since this disease has been staring me in the face for the last week ever since that doctor did the biopsy and my face swelled up to a size of Mt Rushmore. But at times I am looking through a mirror a different persons life. This is not me. I don’t have this. I am not going to be scarred or disfigured. I am not going to be in pain. I am not…not… I wonder what the doctor will tell me next week?

After the whole ordeal with the doctor on Thursday I was so tired I went to bed at 8pm. If you knew me that never happens. Eleven or twelve is usually my norm. It's all stress. I am trying to read as much about this on the internet but I am not finding a site that gives me what I need. I did however, find a support group on Yahoo for this disease. I placed a link at the bottom of my blog. I am hoping that they will give me some real insight into this crazy world that I just came part of. Well, at least here is hoping.

L